Sunday, February 20, 2011

Official Drink of the Rugby World Cup - Kiwi Cola

dun dun dun....

Actually no - it is Coke. However, I make the Kiwi Cola and though it would have been perfect for visitors to the Cup - something that contains New Zealand Native Kawakawa.

The thing is - sooo much tax payers $$$ has been thrown at the World Cup - you would have thought the locals - like me would have had a crack at selling and showcasing their products - in the hope of targeting larger markets.

No doubt - I will not be able to sell Kiwi Cola - anywhere near any of the events or parties.... I will be banished to the local markets - to sell my gourmet sparkling cola product surrounded by Leeks and baby carrots.

Horse Semen at the Wild Foods Festival

So the joke goes (imagine a posh voice) - "Actually Snail shit is a delicacy where I come from!"

In that vein we have the latest scare tactics from the amazing Hokitika Wild Foods Festival - Horse Semen Shots.

However, rather than just serving up pure semen... they are adding flavours to it to make it more palatable.

The story - reported at - has got the back up of at least one reader judging by the comments section - the gist - that serving up shots of Horse Semen - is disgusting at so many levels - and that one of those levels is pornographic.

The idea behind the product - something to do with testosterone - making lazy guys horney again... so like:

STEP ONE - shot of horse semen
STEP TWO - take Viagra etc...

However experts also say you would have to swallow at least two litres of Horse semen - before you would notice anything.

It's all very Chinese medicine really.

In crude terms - horses are seen as sexual beasts - think hung like a horse.... stallion (often applied to Shane Warne). Therefore if you imbibe their semen - you too will be a well hung stallion.

Apparently John Key has had a few shots... in the vein hope that Hornery Warnie breaks up with Liz Hurley.

Yes I've had a glass of wine - and the day has been a slow one.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Steinlager - least we forget

Funnily enough it was the drinking of a bottle (on sale at Countdown) of Krombacher - a premium German Pislner (as Krombacher is good!)  - that reminded me of Steinlager. Plus the fact - that I'd had some Steinlager tinnies that night before ...

Look Steinlager has to go down as one of New Zealand's great beers. The marketing - the branding - all top notch.

The flavour - strong - hoppy - direct - international - confident - and mostly just plain distinctive etc... In other words nothing like the fussy - myopic beers so loved by the craft industry these days.

Dam it is good!

I urge some of the beer glitterati to try it.

The history of the beer is here (assuming Lion Nathan did not write this!):

Perhaps - other Kiwi Brewers need to look at what makes a great world class/international beer... as opposed to what makes a really fussy/complex one?